Navigating A Personal Style Crisis

What happens when your wardrobe doesn’t feel like you anymore?  I recently went through a bit of a personal style crisis and this is what I learned.

When I was in my 20’s, I would go clubbing and to restaurants for most meals.  I valued always wearing something new and was constantly shopping.  I worked in an office and stocked up on a lot of business casual pieces.  The importance of image outweighed comfort.  I cared about trends and having every outfit stand out, and wore heels to my 9-5 and pretty much any time I went out.  It was all about dressing up, looking good, and showing off my figure.  I was young and working in the fashion industry and then started my own business in my mid-twenties.  It was a decade of relatively carefree fun and I’m so glad I went through it, especially while I had all that energy!

Adam and I recently renovated our bedroom and I was switching from an IKEA Pax to a DIY open concept closet system, which meant that I spent months sorting through our belongings.  It was quite therapeutic to declutter my wardrobe (you can see my top closet decluttering tips in this post) and I cut my clothing and accessories down to about 40% of what I’d started with.  Which is HUGE progress!

As this past winter was winding down, I reevaluated the remaining contents of my closet and noticed that I really only wear a quarter of what was hanging in front of me.

That’s when I realized that I wasn’t dressing for this season of my life.   I think I was holding onto who I was in my twenties, even though I didn’t even necessarily want to be that person any more.

Guys, I work from home and have a dog now.  I’m here a LOT.  I own like 8 pairs of black cotton leggings that I rotate through as loungewear and I flipping love it.  I need comfort and practicality over anything else.  I wear snow boots in the snow, rain boots in the rain, and a giant warm winter coat on cold days.  With our dog having separation anxiety, going out for dinner and/or dressing up is a rare occurrence.  And that’s fine with me.  It makes going out even more special than it ever used to be and I love playing dress up for it.  Plus, the health and dietary benefits of cutting out restaurant meals has been huge for Adam and I.  Mini skirts, sexy dresses, and towering platforms have no use to me and I prefer to minimize my cleavage rather than show it off.  I’d rather shop smarter and less often.  I value classic pieces that are versatile.

For a while, I felt bad about how casual I’ve become, especially as a “fashion blogger”.  Once I stopped fighting it and began embracing things, I found a sense of peace getting dressed each day. Wearability and style don’t have to be disconnected and this doesn’t mean I’m any less happy or not dressing for what feels like me.  I just think that I’ve changed, in a completely organic way and I’m finally letting go of the idea of old me and embracing this natural lifestyle shift.

I see this happening to others all around me.  People who are holding onto an old size or body shape.  Friends going from pregnancy to motherhood and having to figure out who they are as moms and how to dress for that.  People grasping onto old trends or how they felt years ago.  Retirees with untouched outfits in the back of a closet from previous jobs.  So many of us are guilty of holding onto pieces for ridiculous “just in case” scenarios.   We should own who we are now, in this current season.  It will change again, I assure you, but you’re worth putting in the effort to look and feel like yourself right now, don’t you think?

And since this epiphany is pretty fresh, I’m still learning.  I’ve bought dresses that I should have known I’d never wear or purchased things that better suit my old life.  But, I am now intensely feeling the importance of loving everything I wear and that feeling good can look a number of ways.  Most of which is a t-shirt, jeans, and sneakers these days.  The biggest block I am working through is about re-wearing things.  It’s tough to shed the narrative that sporting a look or item multiple times is frowned upon, as it’s deeply ingrained in me.  That silly idea that you have to buy something new for special occasions like a wedding or vacation. I hate how wasteful that was and am trying to be better about buying multi purpose things and documenting how I remix these outfits.

The capsule wardrobe has been very helpful with this and I will be chatting more about this concept in upcoming posts.  Do you relate to these ideas at all?  If you have a similar story to tell, I’d love to hear about it in the comments below!

‘Lucy’ High Waist Skinny Denim c/o Mavi
‘Brunette’ Florence Vegan Leather Jacket c/o Brunette The Label
Classic White Runners from Vans